Welcome to ‘Why Always Me FC’. A place where everyone knows your name. This weird and wonderful world keeps us guessing and it seems the football world is guessing more than most.

King Eric didn’t wake up one morning and think ‘today I’m going to fly-kick a Palace fan’. I’m certain Mario didn’t mean to burn his house down. Clearly Becks had no intentions of sleeping with the nanny, and obviously Joey Barton just needed somewhere to butt his cigar.

Completing 100 passes, slugging it out at right-back for 90 minutes, or transforming yourself into a human bus will not earn you a place in the starting XI. Each installment will feature the players who are making headlines for reasons other than brilliance on the pitch.

Some sort of connection to the football world is all it takes to earn a place in ‘Why Always Me FC”. No magnet is safe.

The May version of ‘Why Always Me FC’ will take to the field with a 4-4-2 formation:

The FA Media Department - GK

Roy Hodgson’s first England squad was all over Twitter before the FA could make the formal announcement and even before some players were informed on selection. News like this can’t be held back nor embargoes relied upon in the digital age.

Aleksandar Dragovic (FC Basel) - RB

During the medal presentation at the end of the domestic cup final, Dragovic slapped the baldhead of the Swiss defence minster, when the minister turned around to identify the offender, much to the amusement of his teammates Dragovic turned in the other direction claiming innocence.

Serey Die (FC Sion) - CB

Die was suspended for eight weeks after he slapped a ball boy while leaving the pitch following his sides 0-1 loss; apparently the ball boy failed to return the ball with enough haste during the game.

Lucas Neill (Al Jaziera) - CB

Having been released by Al Jaziera its time for Neill, 34 to return home and skipper the Western Sydney franchise. Reports are that he favors another healthy Middle Eastern pay cheque, given his standing in Australian Football and his marketability surely he has the potential to earn just as much in Australia as the UAE where he was paid $1.5m last season.

Delio Rossi (c) (Fiorentina) - LB

The Fiorentina manager, only appointed last November launched himself at one of his own players Adam Ljajic, when Ljajic gave his manager a sarcastic thumbs up after he was substituted. The club consequently sacked Rossi.

Chris Herd (Aston Villa) - RM

The Aussie was involved in a late night scuffle with nightclub staff just days before one of the biggest games of Aston Villa’s season. Video footage shows Herd, who scored his first premier league goal in April, repeatedly kicking in the front door of the nightclub. P.s. Any danger of pulling on the green and gold any time soon?

Gordon Ramsay (Rangers) - CM

The celebrity chef and former Rangers reserve took a shameless dive in response to a Teddy Sheringham challenge during a charity football match and had to be carted off Old Trafford. Harden up Gordon.

Joey Barton (QPR) - CM

Joey’s inclusion in this side this month really needs no explanation. The elbow, the kick, the attempted head-butt, the twitter war, the reasoning; this sort of incident represents exactly what Why Always Me FC is about.

Stephen Pienaar (Everton) - LM

The South African midfielder was fined 1000 pounds for speeding and started laughing during sentencing when the judge revealed he didn’t know who he was “apparently he’s a footballer”.

Carlos Tevez (Man City) - RF

Following Manchester City’s title victory Tevez was parading a sign that read “RIP Fergie”. Apparently Tevez begged a fan to let him hold it up for the cameras. The club apologized although Tevez now says he isn’t sorry and he plans to stay on at City. Tell him he’s dreaming?

Liam Stacey (Swansea University) - LF

The Swansea University student served 28 days in jail and has been banned from setting foot on the university campus for a year after his insensitive and racist remarks about Fabrice Muamba on Twitter.

"LOL (laugh out loud). F*** Muamba. He's dead!!!"was the Tweet. What on earth was he thinking? Hopefully he is just as attacking in the six yard area.

How do you rate the Why Always Me FC line-up? Was Delio Rossi the deserved choice for captain? Who else would you have included in the squad? Let us know what you think by leaving a comment below...

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